FunPusher, where ARE we? It is called....The Dead Zone

How’s it going out there?

I SAID, how’s it GOING OUT THERE?

Wait. Is this thing on?

(picture me fiddling with some cords, plugs, some whispered cursing...and…after a giant feedback crackle…)

Ok, ok. I get it. I know it’s pretty rude to just drop off the face of the Earth, without so much as a See Ya! 

But, I’ve got a good excuse – honest! Lane Stadium Reseating!! You probably spent some time recently agonizing over the pros and cons of MULTIPLE different reseating options; I know I did. You would have thought Rachael and I were planning a military coup to take over a small country with the amount of planning and contingency-development that was going on. (And you'd have been right! HA! Just kidding...) We were practicing some serious strategery, folks. At the very least, it felt like an NFL team’s draft day war room. Seats were going off the board and we were scrambling to come up with Mel Kiper’s Best Available. But. Well. You know we did. J 

Not that I can tell you where our seats are (HI HOKIE STALKERS!), but we’re pret-ty daggone pleased with them. And, seeing as that’s the place my bootay is going to be parked in Lane Stadium for the foreseeable future, you can see the importance, nay, the gravity of the decision. I just wish we’d gotten pics and bios of the folks sitting near us to factor into our decision. How awesome and informative would THAT have been. Hmmm…let’s see…Joe’s hobbies include back waxing and Extreme Chili Cook-Offs. Errrrrrrr, NEXT!!! Me? I’d have been advertising, trying to get the best folks near me…I’m FunPusher, I like to leave games with no voice left and I always bring an extra airplane bottle – Cheers! 

Oh well. A girl can dream, can’t she?   

But, I digress. I am sorry that we’ve been gone for awhile. Really. It could not be helped. This little FunPusher was going crazy in Good Times overload. (HA! I wish.) The reality is slightly…less sensational. I’ve been working. There. I said it. Working. A lot. And while we got in an awesome tailgate for the Spring Game (that wasn’t), it’s still been pretty much several months’ worth of steady working, with not a lot of Good Times going down. Sad, but true. Have I painted an uber depressing picture for you, yet? Are you tracking here?? Do you FEEL MY PAIN???

OF COURSE YOU DO! Because the same could be said for you – you’ve been working like every other brick in the wall, cog in the machine, idiot at the computer. And you can feel it too, can’t you? That crazy tickling sensation that keeps niggling at the back of your brain…it’s not quite a full-fledged voice yet, but it’s, well, it’s building…the volume and intensity is slowing creeping toward higher decibel territory. You can’t quite make out what it’s saying, but you can feel it, nudging you and urging you toward…something. You’ve got this sense of unrest. 

You know exactly what I’m talking about, don’t you?

I’ll let you in on something – it’s normal! This is what happens to us tailgaters at this time of year. The fever starts to set in. It starts to feel like years have passed since the last game. The last time you saw the inside of Lane Stadium. Or breathed the air that makes you think – undeniably – I’m at VT now. (Yeah, I made a cow pasture reference - I can do that, I'm part of the family.)  *Sigh* I miss it so. But, we are now under 100 days until football is back. It will get better! I mean, not before it gets worse…but, then, you already knew that. (I'm nothing if not honest.) ;-)  

So. What to do…?

Well, obviously the answer is drinking. (I know this great little bar...)

But, FunPusher!? What if you can't spend the next 3 months on a bender? (Who ARE you people anyways?)

Ok, ok. This is what you do. You take it one weekend at a time. Plan some Good Times for at least every other weekend. And go on vacation. Seriously. All this stuff will keep your focus elsewhere and you will forget how badly you were jonesing for some Hokie football.

By the time all's said and done and you get back from your Good Times Adventures – it’ll practically be Labor Day weekend, and we’ll be completely geeking out about playing Georgia Tech to open the season – at home! And then you can get down to the REAL business at hand, what we ALL wish we were doing – planning that first tailgate!

And, given that it’s a night game…oooooh, it’s gonna be a doozy.

I can’t wait.    

This.

Carry on.

Believe

First, I apologize for being a bit MIA lately. This first part of the season has been pretty go-go-go. But, I’m here now.

I’m feeling a bit down (still) after that deflating loss to Clemson last weekend so I got to thinking…how could I pick myself back up again? I immediately started thinking of a similar situation from many years ago, back when Tech was still in the Big East. We’d gone on the road and lost miserably to West-by God-Virginia. The upcoming game - also against Miami - held incredible meaning for the remainder of the season. There were a lot of questions and even more discontent swirling around the program and throughout the Hokie Nation. Would the season improve or simply spiral out of control? And that’s when Will Stewart, over at Techsideline.com, wrote the most energizing and motivating column I think I’ve ever read. He called it “Make It Real” and basically it was a plea to the fans to double-down and go all in (to use some gambling metaphors). To come support the team and show how much they still cared. To will those guys to the victory we all needed.

I was pumped and unbelievably psyched just halfway through the column; by the time I’d finished it, I was already attaching it to emails and sending it to other fans. I knew we were going to win an hour before kickoff, watching the fans line up to greet the players during The Walk. Hearing the roar of the crowd that was so loud it reverberated inside my chest. Bottom-line: that column mattered, it ignited the fan base, which in turn helped inspire the team - we throttled Miami in that game.

I know you can’t just recreate that sort of magic whenever you want to, but I’m committing here and now that I’m going to do my part.

I’m going to be there early.

I’m going to have an amazing tailgate and I’m going to get my crew ready to go.

I’m going to cheer even louder on 4th downs than I do on 3rd.

I’m going to lose my voice (again).

And I’m going to get everyone around me to do the same thing.

I may not have quite the audience that Will Stewart has…and that’s ok with me…but I have just as much devotion to my guys and my team. And I can be damn persuasive when I want to be.

I say, let’s go to work, stay focused, stay aggressive, stay hungry. I say let’s make it real, again. I say, let’s make it count.

Let’s go, Hokies – win #5.

It's Almost Here!!

So. This week was - finally - time to start talking tailgate again!! This little Hokie fan could not be happier! We are just over 2 weeks away from the glory that is Hokie football (& tailgate!!) season. I believe we've squared away our awesome tailgate spot again. Now comes the good stuff - planning the 'gate! I'll be back when we've got some more deets...but until then, Kiddies, just rest assured in the fact that we do not open against a high profile team on the road. No! It's 'no place like home' time for us this season!! I, for one, couldn't be happier! The sooner I get my arse to Blacksburg, the happier I will be. So. With that, I will sign off for now. Be back in a few days with a more detailed off season wrap-up & preview of the upcoming Good Times! Go Hokies!!

--FP

Next Season

And, in the least surprising news ever category, VT announces that it will kickoff the season at 12:30, September 3rd against Appalachian State. I am shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you!

This is me trying really hard to find the upside, any upside, to this scenario.

...

...

...

More post-game tailgate time???

Ooooohkay. (quit twisting my arm!) 12:30 will be alright then. ;-)

Go Hokies!


--FP

Treats!

Spring Game was absolutely fan-freaking-tastic. Major shout-outs to all the regular tailgate folks who made it for the "event." (Rachael, myself, and April, of course; but also Wendy, Alex, Amanda, Dwayne, Ashley - minus her gambling fiancee', and the Roberts clan - Trey, Tommy, and Peggy!) It was beautiful weather and I know I can speak for y'all here - it was definitely a Good Time!

Just wanted to share a couple of tidbits for the upcoming season, to get the blood pumping and excitement brewing!! Check this out!!

The new audio for the tailgate. Mr. FunPusher really came through for my birthday! A portable PA system, with built-in Ipod dock, complete with a microphone. OH YEAH!!! Can this be more perfect for me???

And! For those post-game dance parties! A Disco Ball! We are all set now, ladies and gents!

Let's go, Hokies!!

--FP

I Need a Tailgate...STAT!

Well…hello there Hokie fans and fellow tailgaters! Long time, no see! It’s been another long offseason (and it ain’t over yet, bleh), punctuated by yet another snub from the NCAA basketball tournament (always a bridesmaid, never the bride…sniffle). [Sidebar: I would not put it past Greenberg to sue the NCAA next season. Or launch some kind of crackpot conspiracy investigation. Come on, Greenie...I love you, but we all know why we didn't get in...you can't beat #1 and then mail in your last two games like we did! #JustWin]

But, you can take a step toward erasing that dreadful "here we go again" feeling that came from the crushing Orange Bowl loss to Stanford. (Can we please ban the orange helmets??) All it takes to set things back on the right track is a little (er, or a lot of) tailgating in Blacksburg this weekend! (Can I get an amen!!) VT is concluding its spring football practice with the annual Maroon and White game, at 2pm on Saturday. And you know the Gurus will be there, in full effect...Holla!

We've said good-bye to a lot of great Hokie players – Tyrod Taylor, Darren Evans, Ryan Williams, John Graves and others – but that just means we’ve got room for the new guys we’ll come to love watching in the Maroon and Orange.

Not to mention all of the coaching changes that took place this offseason. The Beam’s been busy!! But, I like it. It's a new chapter in VT football. New Coaches; new QB; new energy and new blood. Same Goal. Championships. Period.

SO. If you REALLY need an excuse to come hang out with friends and tailgate in Blacksburg (who ARE you people??), say you need to come check out the newbies and the old favorites. If that doesn’t get you, how’s about Good Times with good friends, food, and tunes?

Not to mention, is it completely inappropriate that I cannot wait to be where it is socially acceptable to drink beer at 9am??? I LOVE TAILGATES!

We’ll be there and you KNOW you want to join! You don’t want to be that person everyone talks about because they didn’t show up. (Because we totally do that shizz.) Peer pressure. Ain't it the greatest??

The Plan has been put into motion. Gonna get there early so we can tailgate in the Big Boy (read: Mondo Contributor) lot and be close to the awesome bathrooms. Come on by and join the party!

Go Hokies!! Thanks for giving us a reason to tailgate!! (And, something to tide me over until September!)

-FP

Pause, and Reflect

This.

Dear Santa...

Please bring the Hokies an Orange Bowl victory! I know we're wearing orange helmets (and this, admittedly, makes me nervous...our other attempts at wild uniform combinations haven't exactly fared well), but we've gotta send Tyrod and the other 15 seniors out with a win...

SO. Santa. You've gotta get those little elves fired up, get 'em working their magic (heck, get Rudolph involved if you have to) and let the good guys win against the Cardinal.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Gurus! May all your holiday wishes come true! (including that Hokie win!)

Go HOKIES!!

-FP

Mike London = the new Al Groh

Man, it always feels good to spank UVA. Although, it sure would feel better if we were actually beating a college football team. I think they’re actually dressing up a bunch of pee-wee kids; this makes for a rather lopsided “rivalry.” I mean, jeez, the last few years we’ve been reduced to inventing rivalries with UNC or Georgia Tech because those are more competitive games. Come on, UVA…make this game something, other than another reason to snooze after Thanksgiving turkey.

And, on that note, another (tailgating) season has come to a close. Now it’s on to the ACC Championship Game and, hopefully, the Orange Bowl. Sadly, I will not be attending either event. (I sense your shock…) Instead, I will be living room tailgating which, although it sounds like a completely laid-back way to watch a game, always stresses me out. For some completely nutty reason, I have it in my head that I can “help” the team if I’m in the stands. (Don’t ask.) Anyway, it was a crazy season and we had a lot of fun, no doubt. I’m extremely proud of this year’s squad for rebounding after such a crummy start. Tyrod Taylor is definitely one of my all-time favorite VT players for the way he has handled himself on and off the field; truly representing what Virginia Tech is all about. We will miss you, TT!

Let me tell you though, not only am I proud of the team, I’m proud of us tailgaters. We weathered those losses right there with the team, but man, did we look cute doing it!

Rachael and I tailgating before the Boise State game at FedEx Field to kick off the season.

The Gurus trying to make the most of a miserably wet day.

That day just got worse when we lost to JM-freaking-U.

And then WE rebounded and rocked the tailgate – new tunes, new gear (who doesn’t love the pop-up VT trash can??), and lots of new Good Times.

The Ladies of the Tailgate, doing one of MANY pictures.

MWAH

Madonna and Hermoine for Halloween and the Duke game (we tailgate everywhere).

Gurus and brother before the Georgia Tech game.

We never did get that RV setup together for the tailgate…although I think we have a plan of attack for next season; I’m already percolating on how to make next season’s experience even better. (I think it involves…amplification…)

We take on FSU this weekend; a team that’s been a bit of a monkey on our backs over the last decade or so. I am certainly no Xs and Os person, so if you want that sort of thing, try here. What I will say is that I am impressed with the character of this VT team. When things aren’t going their way in a game, they don’t give up…they continue to fight and often fight harder. This would be a big game to win. It puts us in the BCS Orange Bowl; it gives us the ACC Championship – and completes a perfect season in ACC play; but most importantly, it’s a step toward winning the “big” games. This team has shown me they’re plenty full of the heart to do it.

Let’s GO!!

Change in Plans

So, my darling husband has done something for which I'm trying very hard to be forgiving. Many weeks ago, we made plans for this weekend to have dinner with some work friends of his. This was, at the time, without knowing exactly when the Hokies would be playing today. I told him, that was fine, but it is a(n away) gameday, so I would still want to be able to watch the game before dinner. Last night he tells me that he has changed plans so that we're heading over to dinner around halftime (it's a 3:30 game) and we'll watch the rest of the game there. (Admittedly, this is a nice concession on their part. I'd've hated to have to cancel completely...)

But, wha??? Hold the phone! If you know nothing else about me, I am quite certain that you have picked up on the oh-so-subtle fact that I am a Pretty Intense Hokie Fan. I go to all the Home games (driving four hours, each way), I plan my weekends around watching them on tv, I don't "do other things" while the game is on. I am a fanatic. (I know this. And I would apologize...but, I sorta like this about me, lol. What can I say?)

Anyway, so now I'm put in the untenable position of A) shuffling my weekend game-watching plans around and B) having to be "social" - already a challenging enough task for me - WHILE watching the game. Basically all of the things I never do.

I know what you're thinking - this is good for me, I'll stretch my boundaries, grow as a person, all that jazz...But can't I do that when the Hokies aren't playing???

Oh well, at least these folks are sort of sports people (ie, they watch baseball)...and, we're still watching the game, while aslo having tacos and CORONAS! Wait. Did I just talk myself into liking this?

I think I did.

We're at UNC and down a couple of key players this week - Dyrell Roberts is out for the season, David Wilson has mono, and Chris Drager is still suffering from some aftereffects of the Georiga Tech game...But we still have Tyrod "Superman" Taylor and some of the best running backs in the nation.

So, this afternoon, I will be watching the game - first from the friendly confines of my living room and, then, from the (hopefully equally friendly) confines of some new friends' living room. I'm just hoping that "Touchdown.....HOKIES!" counts as dinnertime conversation???

Take THAT, Bumblebees!

So, we totally won that junk! What a crazy night in Blacksburg...

Coach Johnson (Georgia Tech), what do you have to say about playing in Lane Stadium on Thursday night?

“...I can tell you one thing. Blacksburg is pretty loud. I have had the opportunity through the years to play in front of probably 95,000 people in different arenas and I have never played anywhere that was louder than Blacksburg was on Thursday night. Especially when the game got tight in the second half. Our guys had a hard time hearing.”

Considering I am STILL recovering my voice, I say thank you, Coach Johnson. It was a pleasure. ;-)

GO HOKIES!!

Can We Skip Wednesday?

It is Tuesday.

It is not, unfortunately, Thursday.

Even though I desperately want it to be Thursday...

It. Is. Not. Thursday.

YET.

As of right now, we are less than 48 hours away from the pure bliss of the Thursday Night Game Experience. The Thursday night game is the perfect combination of all things football: Plenty of tailgate time. Being under the lights at Lane. Fireworks!! AND, while every Joe Schmoe out there is grumbling away at their computer desk on a typical workday…YOU, good VT fan that you are, are midway through your second pitcher of beer during a late lunch in downtown Blacksburg…only to be followed by typical tailgate shenanigans. Yup. You can just have another beer and thumb your nose at those folks that haven’t figured out the college football is a perfectly acceptable reason to miss work. Cheers! (buuuurp…)

So, as I mentioned, it’s Tuesday (aka Not Thursday) and here I sit in my office…thinking about the tailgate and contemplating the finer points of S’mores construction and ingredients (true story!)…This is what you do when you’re a diehard like myself. You schedule your life around The Game. You put off vacations until after The Season. My friends and family know that if they want to see me from September to December…odds are they’re going to have to go to the tailgate. (Rachael has gotten with The Program; what’s up with you, Dad?) Game weeks are a breathless flurry of planning emails and phone calls – tickets, food, travel, ETAs and carpools, cocktails, & supplies. Checking the forecast multiple times (and planning tailgate gear and clothing contingencies). It’s an interesting way to go through life, I can tell you that. When my husband heard on ESPN the other day about a Michigan State fan that, much to the chagrin of his family and friends, put off his pacemaker surgery because he wanted to attend an important game, why was I not surprised when my husband turned immediately to face me and said, “no” – as in, you are not allowed to do that, or anything like it, at any point! (How did he even KNOW what I was thinking??)

But, back to my point. Here I sit, thinking of S’mores. Because this week will be chilly…so, of course we’re thinking FIRE PIT! And (like those word association games the psychiatrist who saw me about my football obsession played), who can think fire (pit) without thinking S’MORES!?! (um. No one.) So. I’m all about it. And, now in typical FP Planner Mode, I thought I’d run a few options by a friend (who also happens to write on this blog) and get some advice. This was something akin to a moment of enlightenment. Apparently there are true S’mores aficionados out there, and these folks have a particular method to their S’mores creation. (I can honestly say that is not on my, admittedly impressive, list of skills.) After multiple s’mores planning emails (go figure – not exactly a phrase you ever think you’ll type!), I think I’ve come up with an appropriate method: Ergo - I will have a variety of chocolates & marshmallows & graham crackers to appeal to different taste palettes. I have found that, when in doubt on things like this, it is best to just go with the Buffet Approach. Give ‘em a little bit of everything and they’re going to find something they like. Just make sure it’s assembled prettily to distract them. Otherwise, they’ll end up finding the ONE thing you didn’t bring. (Worse comes to worst, you can then go to Contingency Plan A: Lie – i.e., “Oh! We just ran out of THAT!”)

So, as if the inclusion of S’MORES wasn’t enough to get your heart pounding for this week’s game…we’re also talking pepperoni rolls, beef and chicken chili, and various other goodies.

Plus, ya know, the fact that there’s going to be a GREAT game in Lane Stadium, complete with fireworks!! Ryan Williams is feeling nearly 100%, so we will have three starting RBs to work with. Tyrod is on fire right now and is going to juke the GT Defense out of its shoes. Hosely isn’t done snacking on opposing QBs yet – I see another interception for him. And this is the week our D really figures it out. We’ve been saying they were young and inexperienced all season…well, here we are, 8 games in…they’re experienced now. They can play with the big boys. John Graves is going to gobble up Josh Nesbitt. Get some, baby!

Plus, as much as it pains me to say it, this is the next to last home game. (it’s a good thing you can’t see my lower lip quivering…sniffle!)

The weather might not look fabulous, but everything else will be awesome!!

Shout out to Trey and April, who won’t be joining us for this year’s Thursday night game…we’ll miss you, but you know we’re going to party it up in your honor!

GO HOKIES!!

Good Tech: 35
Bad Tech: 17

-FP

Symmetry, to a Hokie

Note: GameDay pics from the Central Michigan game should be up soon. If you really must know, we had a slight technical glitch (which revolved largely around the fact that I, um, misplaced my camera...)

So, here we are…another GameDay is (almost) upon us!! I hate to say it, but we might be a little Gurus Gone Wild this weekend, as we are more or less “unsupervised” this go ‘round…Can you say, “trouble?” (bwa ha ha ha!) Ok, we will do our best to behave…but, I think you know that you don’t get to be Gurus of Good Times by behaving…so there!

First on the agenda is me, getting my Hokie-fied self down I-81 and into Roanoke this evening. I am teleworking at the moment, which largely consists of me reading things for work…and then taking regular breaks to put together my list of things I need to take to the tailgate. What can I say…life is good! ;-) Anyway, so I am planning to shove off around 3:30, putting me into ‘Oke-town around 7:30(ish), and I think it goes without saying…the fun will commence immediately. (Although not too much fun, April – we’ll be good enough to function Saturday!) [Sidebar: SO - you might notice the little coincidence that I'm leaving today at 3:30 and the GAME is at 3:30 tomorrow...well, kiddies, if you think it's a coincidence, you must not know me very well. That is called the Circle of (Hokie) Life. Symmetry, dude. Symmetry.]

Second on the agenda, is getting the truck packed up and making sure we’ve got all of our tailgate gear in order. Sorta goes without saying, but I’m sure you can imagine how many times we actually get this done the night before…I will give you two guesses, but I am thinking you will only need one. (hint: see above re: fun commencing immediately.) ;-)

Third…is, of course, getting up bright and early in order to head down to glorious Blacksburg!! (happy dance)

We’ve got some surprises in store this week…looking forward to upping the ante yet again!!

Oh, just a few words about the game…We play Wake. Wake is bad. Hopefully this will be another Skipper-filled afternoon…and we’ll finally get to see Lane under the lights…been a long time coming this season! Still no Ryan Williams (boo) but, it’s better that he be fully rested and recovered by the GT game anyway. Get all your little tailgate ducks in a row…and start bouncing…it’s almost time!!!

Gobble, gobble, b*tches!

VT – 35

Weak Florist – 10


--FP

Love to Love to Love Ya, Love Ya, Love Ya --- HOKIES!

Well, the Hokies have been playing a bit better, which is nice to see :) I truly hope it continues through this weekend's Homecoming Game. Things have been just WILD at the tailgates lately...We've have some absences, and some new additions...overall...I'm very pleased with our tailgating season thus far. Ready for a new tailgate this weekend...hoping to see Doomsday around again soon...Pinecone already made his appearance this year. Andy even changed his shirt....only for me to take on his normal behavior...I love my new Hokie shirt. So, I wear it to every game...after a brief washing of course. Shout out to the other tailgaters making this season so memorable...Jessie, April, Trey, Steve, Meggan, Mike, Andy, Ashley, Brian, Leslie (new baby in the oven) and Tommy!!! We've had special appearances by Scott, Rob, Adam, Alex, Nick, Kevin, Kirsten, Pinecone (Dwayne), and Amanda. Notice how Rob got moved to the special appearances section...and must attend more games to get back into the "regular" crew. LOL....I'll post pics later...It's been massive FUN! Can't wait to rock out to a 3:30 game this weekend! Shout out to Nick from Section 3 in Lane Stadium for hooking me up with such awesome tickets to the last game...I got to see them looking for a pinky finger. Love it!

OhthankyouJesus!

OhthankyouJesus! Another tailgate is almost upon us!! (I have to say, I’ve been oddly…at a loss as to what to do with myself these past two weekends…) And, more than that, the Hokies are on a 3-game win streak! We’ve beaten those crazy purple pirates (arrrrgh!) from ECU at home…and won two straight from previously unbeaten ACC foes on the road (BC and NC State). Even notching the greatest comeback under Beamer last week against State. Dare I say these Hokies have given me back a little bit of the excitement that I had going into this season?? (Not all of it, that would be crazy and, wacky as I might be, I refuse to set myself up for that kind of heartbreak again when my poor little heart is just now starting to heal from the pain of Week 1.)

Our offense is coming to life (which, after being nearly mistaken for dead in the not-so-distant past, is quite impressive).

Darren Evans has demonstrated he’s fully recovered from his knee injury.

Tyrod still might not be the best quarterback in the nation, but when he needs to put the team on his back and make plays, there’s nobody I want doing it more; when he lets himself go and just plays, it can be magical.

Heck, Stinespring even engineered a decent game – his OL/TE formation which freed up Andre Smith for a TD was actually, I have to say it, quite brilliant.

I can’t help it, guys! Hope is starting to bubble back to the surface. As much as I try to squash it and ignore it and pretend it doesn’t exist (la la la la la la la, I can’t hear you!)…I love my Hokies and will always hope that they can pull it off…that they can rebound from the adversity and put it together.

And, well, they always seem to improve as the season goes on…so, maybe there is hope, after all? (I guess the lesson is to just stop scheduling these HARD games as season openers, huh?) We’ve got four – count ‘em, 4! – home games over the next five weeks, all against teams that we can beat. (Although, none are gimmes; JMU taught us that stomach-churning lesson.) This is a chance for us to really put it all together and get a nice swell of momentum behind us as we roll into November and tough away games at Miami and UNC. Hopefully, it’s just what the doctor ordered.

But, enough football talk…because, well, even though this IS a football blog, I know ya’ll really want to hear about the tailgate and the Good Times. Can’t say as I blame ya much there. ;-)

However, we are facing every tailgater’s worst nightmare this weekend: The Nooner. (dundun duuuunnnn) 1:30 games are hard enough (especially after you have spent the previous night being forced, FORCED I say, to have beer after beer with Rachael under the guise of “pre-game warm-ups”), but at least you can get a solid 3 hours of tailgating in beforehand. 12:00 games are just hideous and should really be reserved for…hell, I can’t think of any good reason for ANYone to be forced to kickoff that freaking early (I mean, most football watchers haven’t even finished the morning paper and the Saturday morning Target run by then…what is the freaking deal???). Except maybe for UVA. The Fighting Chris Longs should face nooners as punishment for failing to put forth a decent football team in years…at least until they demonstrate that they actually have a football team again. But, I digress…

So, given how early we need to arrive, we’re talking about a good ‘ol southern breakfast tailgate – eggs, hash browns, biscuits, bloody mary’s, bourbon, and beer. ;-) Oh, and Red Bull, LOTS and lots of Red Bull. You know, the basics.

I have no clue who is coming to this game (other than the fine folks that will be riding along with me, that is). I’m sure it’ll be a lighter crowd than we’ve had thus far, but that’s ok. Mr. FP is planning on going (although, if history is any indicator, you would be wise to “believe it when you see it”). Mr. Rachael is also planning to give this whole tailgating/football thing another shot. And, hey, that right there is reason enough for me to get excited – I am *thisclose* to converting yet ANOTHER person to the Hokie Nation.

Another tailgate is almost upon us…the weather is supposed to be gorgeous…the Hokies are winning again…in essence, all is right with the world! Let’s go, Hokies! Beat Central Michigan!! (And then we can get down to planning the sweetest thing in the world…the 3:30 kickoff tailgate next week for Wake Forest. The perfect mix of pre-game tailgate time and gametime under the lights...and you still get home in time for dinner and a full recap on GameDay Final. Ahhhh, bliss!)

Hokies - 33
Chippewas - 17

-FP

Will the Real VT Please Stand Up, Please Stand Up?!?

OK, peeps. That was a nice coma…But, now that I’m back, what does one say at this point in the season, when we’ve witnessed just about every possible way this VT team can play – good, bad, average, spectacularly bad?? Well, let me tell ya, “We may not win them all…But We've Never Lost a Party.” Take THAT, JMU!

Bleh.

Why did I even bring that up?

OK. Shaking that off. And getting back to the task at hand…

We were on the road last weekend at BC. Did a fabulous job on defense, blanking the (B)Eagles. I can’t be the only Hokie who was truly impressed by how quickly and thoroughly Bud has whipped these young guys into shape. Yeah, they’ll still make some mistakes, but they are looking like yet another Foster (“Australian for Defense”)-quality group of guys. Some minor tweaks to the scheme and his boys are off and rolling.

Sadly, the same cannot seem to be said for our offense…despite loads of hype to the contrary. Who else heard (and believed) all the pre-season chatter about how unstoppable this group would be? I seriously had visions of 30+ a game…Believe me, I just can’t accept how I was fooled AGAIN! This is certainly a topic that has been hashed out in MANY other forums, so I don’t want to belabor the point too much, but it is just a darn shame when we have so much talent and experience on that side of the ball and have to settle for 4 field goals at BC. Come on, O! Come on, Tyrod! I know you guys can defy that albatross of an OC and get this thing going.

Anyways…so this weekend we’re on the road again at NC State. State is 4-0 going into this game, ranked #23, and sporting a pretty impressive QB. The injuries they’ve had in the past are not a factor and this should shape up to be a very exciting game (as long as the GOOD Tech shows up, which, as we know, is something of a toss-up)…

I will be living room tailgating for this one…and looking forward to getting back in the saddle again next weekend for the nooner against Central Michigan (the Chippewas??). After that game, I THINK, we will have played, in recent memory, every possible directional school from the state of Michigan. Should be a good time, as nooners usually are, but we’ll check back in next week with a bit more of a preview for that one.

Wow. This was such a completely unfunny post. Sorry for that. It’s a weird time to be a VT football fan…but it’s always good to be a Hokie.

LET’S GO!

VT 24, NCSU 20

-FP

Waaaaah. That is all.

(Note: Apologies in advance for a downer of a post; just, well, just...sorry.)

Well, the Boise game did NOT go how I’d hoped. Yet another big game slipped through our fingers. I cannot imagine a crowd that has worked harder to will their team on to victory. I am not exaggerating when I say I am just now coming out of the funk. Nor am I exaggerating when I say I gave serious consideration (ME!) to not going to the game this weekend. The bloom is so far off this rose for me right now, I can hardly fathom the idea of getting excited for a tailgate again. But, I’m going to quote two of my favorites – Scarlett O’Hara and Annie – it’s all about tomorrow. It is, after all, “another day” and “only a day away.”

In a rare spot of good news – Steve has managed to secure us parking passes again this year, so it doesn’t look like the tailgate crew will be split up as I originally feared. But, they cost more and there’s no discount for the season like they’ve had in years past. Grrr.

I can barely muster enough energy for this blog and, for that, I’m truly sorry. Oh well. life goes on, somebody else has it worse, at least we’re still ranked #13, blah, blah, blah. Go hokies. Or something. Just don’t friggin’ lose to JMU or I might slip into a coma. On purpose.

Blah.

I'm #@$^%#$ Pumped!!!

Sooooo, it’s about that time again and all I can say is THANK GOD. I have been mentally packing my truck with Gameday gear for weeks now. We are mere days away from the beautimous thing that is College Football Season (I guess less if you’re a Gamecock fan). I, for one, cannot wait. It has been a LONG offseason. But, thankfully, it’s given me the time I needed…to accumulate more and MORE fantastic tailgating gear! As I talked about back in April, we are moving on up (to the East Side!) and are now the proud owners of the thing that sets real tailgaters apart from pretenders: The Tent. We are now prepared for (just about) whatever Mother Nature throws at us. Take that! Moreover, I upgraded vehicles in the offseason…and can I just say, I love my truck. (Author’s note: If this is the first and last time you hear this, consider yourself lucky.) Third row seating (to squeeze in those extra tailgaters) and lots of trunk space otherwise, to make sure all the coolers and gear get there! We’ve got a bunch of other goodies, but we’ll just have to unveil them one at a time – I can’t ruin ALL my surprises! But, suffice it to say, that Rachael and I have been busy little Hokie bees this offseason!

But, this brings us to now…as in…5 days from kickoff! If you aren’t pumped for this game, you (or a friend) should check your pulse, because you might be dead. Seriously. So many unanswered questions. So many things we’re SURE of (but which could be wildly untrue anyways.) Is Boise for real…or does their cream puff conference create a false impression of how good they are? Is this the best Offense we’ve ever fielded? (and the corollary, can we actually get all those amazing pieces to work together?) Will Bud just reload on Defense, as per normal? Is this, dare I say it, The Year? Maybe, most importantly, what is up with the black uniforms??? All of these questions (and more!) will be answered soon enough.

We’re doing the Buffett concert/Hokie kickoff weekend spectacular again! This time, we’re gonna get it RIGHT. Hurricane Earl had better twist and turn in another direction, because nobody named Earl is raining on my parade. (Hokie tent or not!) We’re gonna waste away in Margaritaville on Saturday, recover on Sunday, and then go absolutely effing bananas on Monday. Just like, by the way, the entire freaking VT team is going to do. (Smack talking commences in 3…2…1…) Boise, meet Tyrod Taylor. He will shred you guys. No way can you effectively gameplan all the ways he will do this. Also, allow me to introduce you to the 3-Headed Monster of Ryan Williams, Darren Evans, and phenom David Wilson. Prepare to have tracks up your back as they run over you. Kellen Moore, you throw up some serious Nintendo numbers, but you’d better watch out for our Defense – talent, skill, speed, and, more than anything, sheer WANT TO. If our Offense lets you on the field, you’d better act fast.

So, load up the cooler, make that run to the liquor store, bring out the lucky Gameday Shirt…Do whatever you have to do…

Because my gut tells me this year will be special.

YouTube practically confirms it.

All I will say for sure is, “I believe.”



-FP

What do you mean it's still Baseball season?

Where are you, Football Season? I have been having an excellent summer – going on great vacations and doing everything I can to get my mind off of you…But my mind keeps turning back to Labor Day weekend…Boise State…FedEx Field…and then on to the rest of the season and tailgating in our fabulous spot at the German Club…spending great times with terrific people…showing off some excellent tailgate upgrades…and cheering on my favorite boys in orange and maroon in that little slice of Heaven known as Lane Stadium…

I can hear the crack of a can opening…the soft fizz of my bourbon mixing with coke…

I can smell the burgers sizzling…and taste the apple pie (giggle)…

I can see the Wave…as much as I hate it…circling Lane Stadium…

I can feel the warm September sun on my face…and the chill of the ice in the stocked cooler…

But...it’s too early for Tailgate Fever to set in.

Isn't it?